To His Coy Youtube

To His Coy Youtube

Had we but seconds enough, and minutes,
This coyness, Youtube, were no crime.
We would sit down and click every which way
To spectate and pass our heavily advertised day.
Thou by the gaming channels’ side
Shouldst angry teenagers find: I by the slow
Wifi would complain. I would
Watch you ten years before cat videos,
And you should, if you please, queue
New videos til the conversion of my mind to mush.
My love for cat videos should grow
Vaster than empires, and more slow;
An hundred years should be spent
My eyes and on thy comment section gaze;
Two hundred to adore each parody music video;
But thirty thousand to the cute babies smiling;
An age demographic at least to every channel,
And the thumbs-up section should show your worth;
For, Lady, you deserve this “like”,
Nor would I love at lower video quality.


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